I am Erin/ I Live the Life of My Dreams, All Day, Any Day.

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Why This Website & Book?
To share my story on this website, and in great detail in my book, to help anyone I can, in his or her transition. I also hope to provide information, to anyone interested in the life of a trans woman, especially those who are over 50.
What Is Your Profession & Hobbies?
I am a full-time professional railroader at CSX Transportation and self-employed professional photographer at Henrico Photo. My hobbies are watching Dutch TV & movies and model railroading.
When Did You Came Out?
I came out the closet in October 2014, first to my children, and in little steps to my other family and friends, and finally completing in December to my co-workers. One exception is my Mom. My Mom lives in the Netherlands and I wanted to tell her face to face, not over the phone. So, I came out to my Mom in May 2015.
What was the hardest part?
The hardest part was coming out of the closet. The second hardest part was my first year of transitioning, since I was very masculine looking and needed to do my RLE “Real Life Experience”. This is living full-time as a woman, before approval to medical transition is given. Although nowadays it can be replaced with signing a letter of consent, if the doctors accept this.
Where Are You Located?
I am located in Richmond Virginia USA.

My Progress in my transition

  • Hormone stable · 100%
  • Legal transitioning · 100%
  • Surgeries: GRS yes, no BA and FFS 100%
  • Facial hair removal · 75%

am born in the Netherlands in 1963, and I lived there until 1988, after I moved with my wife to the USA. I worked for the Dutch State Railroad and I married my wife, an American GI who was stationed in the Netherlands. In 1986 we got married and in 1988 we moved to the USA. We have four dear children, three daughters and one son, and five lovely grandchildren, three girls and two boys.

Since 2000 I live in Richmond Virginia, currently together with some of my children and grandchildren. I am employed with CSX transportation working in a local railroad freight train yard, as well as doing studio portraiture at my home studio.

In December 2014 I had my first laser hair removal procedure, which started my physical transitioning from male to female. In 2015 I went to see my mental health therapist, and was officially diagnosed with gender dysphoria, which is needed to start hormones via my endocrinologist. I started Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) in that same year. I than worked on my legal transitioning, which I completed in 2016.

In 2017 I had my Gender Reconstructive Surgery (GRS), and in 2019 I considered myself stable and complete in my transitioning, although physical changes are still ongoing. I am currently not sure if I am going for Breast Augmentation (BA) and/or Facial Feminization Surgery. (FFS)

If you are looking for support in your location search for local "transgender support groups" in the Yellow Pages. Oh wait, forgive me I am over 50, so you better try Google or any other internet search engine.

You can also Contact me, and I might be able to help locate a support group for you. On this website I have some links that might be of general help.

Medical disclaimer: I am not a MD, NP or RN, just another person who stick syringes in herself.

The content on this website is for information only, not advise or guarantee of outcome. Information is gathered and shared from reputable sources; however, I am not responsible for errors and omissions in reporting or explanation. No individuals should use the information, resources or tools contained within to self-diagnose or self-treat any health-related condition. I don’t give assurance or warranty regarding the accuracy, timeliness or applicability or the content.

My mom and dad: Cornelia van Beveren-Faasse and Pieter van Beveren

Without you I would not have been.

My wife: LouAnn van Beverern-Saulters My children: Najah, Angelique, Erwin Paul and Faith Annalisa My grandchildren: Hope, Charity-Anna, Cristian, Gabriella and Jaelyn

Thank you for your love and support throughout my life.

Erin Paula van Beveren

I am... myself.

As I have reached the end of documenting my transition, I have put the data together.

I'm asking myself: was it all worth it?

Was it worth the time?
Was it worth the pain?
Was it worth being made fun off?
Was it worth the fears?
Was it worth the hassle?
Was it worth the risks?
Was it worth the changes?
Was it worth the financial cost?

In one word... YES.

Yes, it was, and is. To finally have become outside what my inside felt all before. To sleep at night feeling my soft skin. To wake up and dress however I like to. To be able to cry without reason. To go out and feel beautiful. To have new friends. To be loved. To be part of this community. To be accepted. To be all I can be. To be free. To be admired. To be in love with myself. To be happy. To be... ME.

So yes, it is worth every minute, every dollar, every tear, and every “ouch”, everything...

The first picture is myself after 5 years, in 2019, without any make-up. The second picture is my Photoshopped visual, I created in 2014, before coming out and starting my transition, of what I was thinking I might look like. Not bad, I think.

May 1964

Mom, Dad and me, with my first birthay cake in may 6, 1964. Many more cakes to follow.

The 1980's

My mom, dad and me sometime in the early 1980's. This is the last professional family portrait I have with my father, before he passed away in 1996.


My girlfriend LouAnn, soon to be fiancé and wife.

July 1986

Our wedding

May 2018

My mom, wife, children, grand children and me, while on a family vacation in May of 2018. Not showing in this picture are my two grand children: Gabriella and Jaelyn.

April 2020

My mom in April of 2020, while being under a 100% lockdown in her nursing home. This picture was taken by a nurse during the covid-19 epidemic. Because of the travel restrictions, our planned vacation to my mom was cancelled. This is the first time since 1996 that I won't physically see my mom.

The van Beveren Family

  • Corrie
  • Pieter
  • LouAnn
  • Erin
  • Najah
  • Angelique
  • Erwin
  • Faith
  • Hope
  • Charity-Anna
  • Christian
  • Gabriella
  • Jaelyn
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This page first released on 08/13/2020 Updated on 03/13/2021